


Wizards are Jerks

by GeminiMoon14



Series: The Woes of a Goblin Girl (or How Does Nott Keep Getting into Trouble?!) [6]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Baby Nott, Background Spoilers, Backstory spoilers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Language, Found Family, Gen, I Still Don't Know Why That Isn't a Tag, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, In regards to Fjord's orphanage, Jester is Good With Kids, Kid Beauregard, Kid Fic, Molly is Good With Kids, Nudity, Self-Indulgent, Some hurt/comfort, Spoilers, Temporary Nudity, Wizards are Grouchy, for like a paragraph or two, just a lot of cuteness, kid Caleb Widogast, kid fjord, spells
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:36:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24583912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeminiMoon14/pseuds/GeminiMoon14
Summary: First things first, as adorable as the situation is it is also a major inconvenience. Secondly, who even came up with that kind of spell? Were they just bored and felt like it would be funny? And lastly, how were they going to fix this?
Relationships: Beauregard Lionett & Caleb Widogast, Beauregard Lionett & Mollymauk Tealeaf, Beauregard Lionett & Nott, Fjord & Beauregard Lionett, Fjord & Caleb Widogast, Fjord & Jester Lavorre & Beauregard Lionett & Nott & Mollymauk Tealeaf & Caleb Widogast & Yasha, Fjord & Mollymauk Tealeaf, Fjord & Nott (Critical Role), Mollymauk Tealeaf & Caleb Widogast, Nott & Caleb Widogast, Nott & Mollymauk Tealeaf
Series: The Woes of a Goblin Girl (or How Does Nott Keep Getting into Trouble?!) [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1767250
Comments: 4
Kudos: 97





	Wizards are Jerks

First things first, as adorable as the situation is it is also a major inconvenience. Secondly, who even came up with that kind of spell? Were they just bored and felt like it would be funny? And lastly, how were they going to fix this?

Apparently, wizards who have locked themselves away in their tower for years do not like sudden guests on retrieval missions. They also do not like it when you fight back after they attack you for dropping by unexpectedly. The Mighty Nein discovered these facts very quickly while on a retrieval mission for The Gentleman.

The wizard was on his last legs when he spotted an opportunity and seized it. Caleb had been knocked prone from avoiding a blast at his feet when Fjord had rushed over to help him onto his feet. At that moment, Nott revealed herself and shot at the wizard; she narrowly avoided hitting Beau, who had gotten close to deal the most damage. 

The wizard held his hands towards the group, a bright green light gathering in his palms, and blasted a cone that engulfed the four and sent them flying back. They all cried out as the cone surrounded them and suddenly there were only bundles of clothing and armor on the floor where they had stood. 

Yasha, already in a rage, screamed in anger and cut through the man, bisecting him as he fell to the floor dead. She lifted her blade and plunged it through his head, wanting to ensure he did not rise again. Jester and Molly rushed towards where Caleb, Nott, and Fjord had been and looked at the clothes and armor left behind. Yasha stayed near the blue robes of the Cobalt Soul and reached out to examine them for clues when something inside the bundle moved. 

Yasha froze as she softly called out, “Something’s moving, I don’t think they’re dead.” Molly and Jester nodded as Caleb’s clothing began to wiggle. Slowly, Yasha took hold of the edge of Beau’s robes and pulled away. There was a shriek as a small human girl pushed away from her, Beau’s shirt and pants too large for her small frame dragging behind her.

The moment she shrieked, all hell broke loose and the other bundles suddenly jumped up and ran for the nearest hiding spot. The human girl was about to run away when Yasha gently stated, “No no no, it’s okay, Beauregard. I’m not going to hurt you.” The girl froze and turned back to Yasha, who put away her weapon and assured, “We’re here to help, it’s just me and my friends. We’re here to protect you.” Beau looked at her with deep suspicion and demanded, “How do you know my name?”

Yasha turned to her other teammates for assistance, which Molly understood and supplied, “We came here to rescue you and the others. That nasty wizard seemed to want test subjects so we were hired to rescue you.” Beau looked past him at the other children peeking out from their hiding places and heard Yasha tell her, “You’re all safe now. We’re here to protect you.” 

Yasha held her hand towards the human child, offering it to her in a gesture of peace, and the girl took it. Yasha gently pulled the girl onto her feet and looked towards her remaining teammates who were trying to coax them all out. There was a shock of red hair attempting to hide itself beneath a desk in the corner of a room that was obviously Caleb, a green skinned boy who had crawled into a cupboard and was peeking out at the strangers that seemed to be Fjord. On top of a bookshelf, she could see the even tinier body of Nott curled in on herself as she carefully observed the group. 

Jester smiled at them as she said, “Hi, my name’s Jester! I’m here to take you somewhere safe and these are my friends!” She gestured to the other tiefling and the aasimar woman. Molly smiled charmingly as he bowed and introduced, “Greetings, my name is Mollymauk Tealeaf but my friends call me Molly.” Yasha, still holding Beau’s hand, gave an awkward smile as she told them, “My name is Yasha. Like Molly said, we’re here to save you.” 

Jester looked over at the cabinet where Fjord was hiding and said, “C’mon out here Fjord! It doesn’t look very fun in there.” The half-orc’s eyes widened in alarm and he called out, in an accent that was not his own, “How do you know my name?” At this point, Beau stepped forward and said, “Someone probably told them. They said a wizard was gonna zap us, remember.” 

Fjord shot her a look as the girl placed her hands on her hips and walked towards him. He flinched when she came close enough but she simply held it out and snapped, “C’mon, I don’t wanna stick around in some creepy lair, do you?” His eyes went wide again as he scrambled out of his hiding place and grabbed her arm. He looked a few years younger than her and was a lot less confident than the Fjord they remembered. Beau turned to Caleb and called out, “You coming too?” He stepped out, fidgeting with his fingers, and mumbled, “ _ Ja _ , I want to go home.”

Yasha turned towards the bookshelf and the trembling form of Nott and held her arms out, telling her, “I’ve got you. It’s alright.” Nott crept towards the edge and Yasha’s hands before slowly allowing Yasha to pick her up. Once she was secure in Yasha’s arms, Nott curled against her chest like a kitten and started purring. Molly chuckled as he took Caleb’s small hand and said, “Time to go everyone! Find an adult and hold their hand.” Beau took Jester’s offered hand and guided Fjord as they walked. They grabbed what was not already on the children and carried it.

Once out of the tower, the kids took in their surroundings. They were surrounded by tall trees with thick trunks, a thin layer of frost on the ground. Fjord shivered and moved closer to Beau as he asked, “Where are we? This isn’t Port Damali.” Caleb also huddled closer to his guide and mumbled, “ _ Es ist kalt, Herr _ Tealeaf.” Molly kneeled down to the child’s level, gave him a warm smile, and told him, “Call me Molly, Sweetheart. Now, why don’t we all find a place to sleep? I bet you’re all starving.” 

Setting up camp was not as difficult as it could have been with four small children. They asked for the children to introduce one another; all of them except Caleb gave the names they already knew. Needless to say it was confusing when Caleb told them, “My name’s Bren.” They resolved to wait until after this mess was fixed to delve into that.

Beau was put in charge of keeping the others safe, a job she took up with great pride. She passed Nott over to Fjord, who seemed a little less nervous about everything, and told them stories her nanny had told her with brave heroes. Caleb and Fjord listened, completely enraptured by the way she would pose and add sound effects to punctuate her stories. Nott for the most part was content to nap in the arms of the older boy and enjoyed when he pet her head.

Once tents and the campfire had been set up, the kids were ready to get some food and go to sleep. Jester smiled as she handed out bowls of stew to the kids, offering to take Nott from Fjord temporarily. He hesitated but eventually let her take the tiny goblin from him and shoved as much of the food as he could into his mouth. Molly gently placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder and commented, “You’re going to choke if you keep that up.”

The half-orc suddenly stopped, swallowed, and handed over the bowl with a small, “Sorry, sir. I won’t do it again.” Molly frowned and pushed the bowl back towards the boy as he let him know, “There’s nothing to be worried about, I just don’t want you to hurt yourself. Ease up on the pace and you’re golden.” Fjord looked down at the bowl like he was being tested and Molly took a closer look at the boy. 

The child was slender, a little too much for someone with orcish blood, and held himself like he did not want to be seen. Molly’s face tightened as he said, “No one is going to hurt you, Fjord. You can eat as much as you want to just don’t hurt yourself when you do. We’re gonna look after you all, so have at it.” Fjord watched Molly as he took a cautious bite of his food. When he saw no movement that contradicted Molly’s statement, he dug into his meal a little slower but just as eager.

Caleb and Beau ate their food at a normal pace, if a little messier than normal. Nott was a little trickier considering that her state seemed much younger than the others. Jester was more than happy to sit the child in her lap and feed her small spoonfuls of broth. 

Once everyone was done, Molly shooed the children back to one of the tents and said, “C’mon time for bed.” Beau seemed hesitant at first but gave in when Fjord and Caleb asked her to come with them. Molly noticed the shirts they wore hardly covered them and commented, “It’s going to be freezing so let’s fix that.”

With Jester’s help, and a few borrowed clothes from Nott’s bag, they managed to outfit the kids with something more substantial than their oversized clothes, a diaper for Nott just in case, and created a large nest of blankets and bedrolls. The kids settled into it without much trouble, Fjord and Caleb slotting under Beau’s arms and Nott settled in on top of her chest. 

Molly chuckled as he asked, “You okay, little one? It doesn’t look very comfortable laying like that.” Beau puffed her chest up as much as she could with a goblin on her chest and insisted, “I’m fine, they need someone tough to make’em safe and I’m the biggest so there!” The tiefling managed to suppress a laugh as he ruffled her head and told her, “If you’re sure, sleep well.” 

He popped his head outside of the tent and told his remaining adult friends, “I’ll take last watch, gotta keep the kiddos warm. Wake me when it’s my turn.” He reentered the tent, and curled around the nest they had made. Yasha offered to take first watch while Jester warmed up their tent. She seemed a little worried about the kids but decided she would check on them when it was time to wake Molly.

Yasha’s watch was uneventful as the night air became much colder than it had been. When she woke Jester, she was very glad that the bedding had been heated by the previous occupant. For her part, Jester was fine with the cold and maintained the fire so that they could start on breakfast pretty quick. She glanced at where Molly was keeping the kids warm and found herself a little worried about how to fix the situation.

Eventually, she crept over to the kids tent and shook Molly awake. He jolted a little but relaxed when he realized it was his turn to keep watch. He stretched and looked over the kids. Beau was buried beneath the others, Fjord had put his head on her chest and had grabbed hold of Caleb’s hand. Caleb was curled into a ball with his head on Beau’s stomach and the rest of him was on top of her legs. Nott had tucked herself in Beau’s armpit, her tiny head on top of her shoulder.

Molly affectionately ruffled their hair and whispered, “Keep them warm for me dear.” Jester smiled and laid down where he had been. He smiled and said, “Sleep well.” He saw Jester’s pile of firewood and started contemplating what to make for the kids, trying to consider what Nott could eat.

When morning came, Molly was reheating some of yesterday’s leftovers with a few spices to make things interesting. Yasha got up before the others and started to pack up the unoccupied tent. Breakfast was done within minutes and Molly was eager to get back on the road to hopefully find out how to fix this, suggesting that Pumat may know something. 

He convinced Yasha to wake Jester and the kids, who all stumbled out barely awake. Beau rubbed at her eyes tiredly, Fjord and Caleb clinging to her pants that they had borrowed from Nott’s bag, and the goblin girl whimpering and crying. Fjord let go of Beau so that he could cradle Nott and gently reassure her. 

Jester managed to barely prevent a squeal from being heard as Nott grinned happily and grabbed at his face. Fjord grinned as he told her, “We’re gonna get food, so you gotta be good.” She squealed in delight and gummed on his hand. He made a face but let her continue to use her toothless mouth to chew on his hand. 

Yasha took Nott from him with a small bowl of broth in hand and began to feed her. She was fine for the first two spoonfuls but began to squirm and reach for Fjord. Yasha watched the baby and said, “Come here, you need to eat.” Nott let out a whine and continued to make grabbing motions at Fjord, kicking her little feet. 

The other kids watched as Nott began to cry as Yasha held her a distance away from the ground. Beau smiled as she shifted so that she was a little closer and said, “You should do the ship trick.” Yasha gave her a confused look as the girl took the spoon and sang, “Here comes the ship, sailing in with yummy food!” Nott stopped fussing and watched as Beau made the spoon glide around and made whooshing noises. She grinned as Beau easily slid it into her mouth. 

Molly gave her an impressed look and commented, “Nice trick.” Fjord smiled and said, “Sometimes the caretakers would do that for the babies.” Beau smirked as she declared, “That’s because babies love fun!” Caleb looked at her with admiration in his eyes and asked, “Where did you learn about babies?” She shrugged and told him, “Dunno, just seemed obvious.” Nott watched the spoon in Beau’s hands as the girl continued making noise and feeding the baby. 

Once everyone had eaten, Molly crouched in front of the children and stated, “Now that we’re in a safer spot let’s do some proper introductions. We know your first names but how old are you all and where are you from?” Beau crossed her arms as she questioned, “If you were coming to rescue us why don’t you know?” Molly smiled as he answered, “Ah! You see, they told us a few names they thought they heard but didn’t tell us how old you all were.”

She stared at him like she did not believe him but told him, “I’m Beauregard and I’m from Kamordah. I’m eleven and a half.” Molly nodded his thanks before gesturing to Fjord who said, “My name’s Fjord. I’m five and I live in Port Damali.” He shuffled behind Beau who seemed confused at his origins but shrugged it off as Caleb announced, “Hallo, I’m Bren Ermendrud. I’m also five and I live in the Zemni Fields.” They all looked at the baby goblin in Fjord’s arms as the oldest asked, “What about her?” 

Jester sat herself next to Fjord and divulged, “This is Nott and she’s one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen.” Fjord gave them a look and asked, “Is she like me? We both got the same color.” The other two looked closely between the goblin baby and the half-orc boy before Beau gasped and exclaimed, “You two gotta be related! Maybe she’s your little sister and that wizard wanted you both ‘cause of your parents!” 

Molly’s eyes widened in shock as Fjord nodded and Caleb joined in by proclaiming, “What if our  _ eltern _ made him mad and he wanted to hurt us!” Fjord tugged on his shirt as he asked, “What’s an  _ eltern _ ?” Caleb quickly clarified, “Our mamas and papas. What if they made him mad?”

Beau nodded like she understood and informed the other two, “My dad is always talking about how a hag was going to steal a bit of his fortune so he might’ve pissed off a wizard too.” The other kids began to tear up as Caleb cried, “I don’t wanna get eaten by a hag!” Fjord’s lip trembled as he wailed, “Me neither!” Nott sensing the distress also began to cry and Beau was trembling, as though realizing something frightening, as she asked Molly, “Did the hag try to kidnap us?!”

Caught off guard by the sudden tears and fright, Molly could only sit there in shock as the kids wept and trembled in fear. Jester immediately wrapped her arms in a hug around Caleb, pulled him into her lap, and gently soothed, “No one’s getting eaten, it’s okay, Ca-Bren. No one’s gonna get you.” Molly followed her lead as he took Beau by the shoulders and confirmed, “The hag didn’t kidnap you. It was just a nasty old wizard who shouldn't have taken you. You’re okay.”

Yasha also scooped up Fjord and Nott, albeit awkwardly and unsure, and whispered,”I’ve got you. It’s okay.” Fjord eventually stopped crying which also made Nott stop crying. Fjord was sniveling a little but he was mostly calm as Yasha sat him in the cart and told him, “Stay here. My friends and I are going to take you someplace safe. We’re making sure no one else is going to get you.” 

He sat down on the blanket covered cart floor with Nott and nodded his understanding. She gave him a small smile and said, “Thank you for listening. Stay put and the others will be here soon.” He set Nott down on the floor and started to play with her a little as Yasha helped the others gather the rest of the kids. Once they were all settled, Molly took the reins and got them moving.

The day passed rather peacefully considering they had children cooped up in a cart. There were a few close calls with Nott getting bored and trying to climb out. Fjord usually stopped her and would tell Beau. Beau took it upon herself to keep the little ones happy as she told them about fights she had gotten into and showing them hand games. Despite her best efforts, Nott began to fuss and refused to stay put. 

After the fifth time Nott tried to climb out of the cart and the other kids began to complain, Molly stopped the cart and declared, “Time for little ones to stretch their legs! Let’s stop for a bit.” The minute the kids were let out of the cart and safely placed on the ground, Nott went running. 

She disappeared into the bushes for all of ten seconds before popping her head back out with a happy squeal. Fjord followed her into the dense shrubbery and giggled as he called out, “Betcha can’t find us!” Beau immediately took that as a challenge and followed, Caleb trailing behind her. Jester watched and called out, “Stay where we can see you guys!” There were giggles and rustling in the bushes as she approached and asked, “What are you doing in there?”

She heard more giggling and a small bundle of energy leaped into her arms. Jester barely managed to catch Beau as the others followed her lead. She fell onto her back, arms full of children and the breath knocked out of her, when Nott toddled out of the bushes and flopped on top of the pile.

Molly keeled over with laughter, his whole body shaking with mirth, and asked, “Ya having fun there?” Jester shot him a look and shouted back, “You're just jealous you don’t have a cuddle pile of cuteness!” Nott shouted random babbles as well and scampered up to Yasha. 

The barbarian looked at the tiny goblin and smiled as the child made a reaching motion. She indulged the baby and hoisted her onto her shoulders, careful to keep her balanced. Nott shrieked with glee which prompted the others to follow her lead. Caleb walked up to Molly and nervously muttered, “ _ Herr _ Mollymauk, could you… with me?” The purple tiefling understood and scooped the boy onto his back as he told him, “Hold tight.” He ran, carrying the human boy on his back. 

Caleb laughed and shrieked with glee as he urged, “Faster! Go faster!” Molly smiled and turned sharply as he sped about the open area. Fjord stared down at his feet, determined to not make eye contact, and shuffled his feet as though embarrassed. Beau saw this and pulled him onto her back and ran. He yelped but eventually gave in and laughed, his tiny tusks starting to show.

Beau was much faster than anyone expected as she ran past Molly and Caleb. She stuck her tongue out at the tiefling and taunted, “You can’t catch me!” He responded by chasing after her and calling out, “I wouldn’t be sure about that!” She darted ahead, Fjord shrieking with excitement on her back while Jester and Yasha put something together for lunch.

Molly had to give Beau credit, she was really quick, like some part of her remembered the things she could do. She wove across the field in an effort to shake him while Caleb called out, “ _ Schnell! Schnell! _ Faster!” Eventually though, Molly managed to catch up, poke her arm, and announce, “Gotcha! Your turn!” He turned quickly and darted away from the pair with Caleb chanting, “ _ Erwischt! Erwischt! _ ” 

Beau smirked as she wrapped Fjord’s arms around her middle and told him, “Don’t let go and hold tight! I'm gonna catch him real fast.” The half-orc boy clasped his hands together tightly as Beau took off, running faster than she had before, and jumped over obstacles. She smiled as she wove tore through the grass and leaped over the bushes dotting the clearing. Yasha and Jester looked on in disbelief as Beau, carrying a child on her back, caught up to Molly and tagged him as she ran past him and jumped over another set of bushes.

Molly froze in shock as Caleb called out, “ _ Tolle!  _ Beau  _ ist so tolle _ !” Molly’s jaw almost hit the ground as he told the little one on his back, “I don’t know what you’re saying, Sweetheart, but you aren’t wrong.” 

Molly kneeled as Caleb climbed off his shoulders and ran to the others still exclaiming, “Beau  _ ist so tolle! Sie ist schnell! _ ” Jester smiled as she said, “Breeen, we don’t know a lot of Zemnian. What are you saying?” He pointed, still excited, in the direction Beau ran off in and declared, “Beau is so amazing and fast and cool and strong and-” Molly put a hand in front of him as he commented, “That’s a lot of ‘ands’ there little one.” Caleb nodded his head and seriously stated, “She’s the best, I want a ride next time.”

Molly glanced to where he saw Beau vanish and asked, “Speaking of next time, shouldn’t she have come back around by now?” Yasha drew her blade, passed Nott to Jester, and ordered, “Bren, stay next to Molly and Jester I’ll be right back.” He tucked next to Jester, who was holding the sleeping form of Nott close to her chest, and murmured, “ _ Ich werde _ , Yasha.”

Yasha pushed into the forest, weapon ready as she stalked towards the trail of broken sticks and branches that left a path through the wilderness. Following the path, she soon heard sounds of growling and a child screaming. She ran, shoving through in what seemed to be the most direct path, and burst out in front of a tall tree with a small pack of wolves. 

She glanced up and saw Beau pushing Fjord onto a higher branch than the one they were already on. He managed to grab onto it and, with Beau’s help, haul himself up. They turned to see what had burst through, terrified, and saw Yasha. Beau grinned as she called out, “Yasha, we’re up here!” She nodded as she called back, voice soft as ever, “I know, don’t look! Cover your eyes!” Beau frowned but turned to Fjord and assured him, “It’s okay, Yasha’s here.She needs us to cover our eyes, got it?” He shut his eyes tightly, clinging desperately to his branch, and whispered, “Okay.” 

Once sure the kids could not see, Yasha unfurled her wings with a loud battlecry and began to carve through the wolves. She sliced through two with one swing, pinning one’ skull to the dirt before removing her sword and tearing into another. A few managed to bite her but she ignored the damage and continued slicing through the wolves that unwisely refused to retreat. By the end of the battle, she stood amongst the bloodied bodies of around six wolves. 

She returned her blade to its sheath before walking back towards the tree and calling, “It’s safe now, you can come down!” Beau uncovered her eyes and let out a soft, “Woah.” Fjord slowly opened an eye as he asked, “They’re gone?” Yasha nodded as Beau helped Fjord down the tree. 

Once they made it safely to the ground, Beau and Fjord flung themselves at Yasha, who was not too bloody thankfully. She pulled them close as Beau, tears in her eyes that refused to fall, choked out, “I’m-m sorry! I-I didn’t mean to! We were playing an-and those wolves saw us an-and I couldn’t-” Yasha shushed her gently and told her, “It’s okay, you’re safe.” Tears finally began to fall as she shoved her face against Yasha’s shoulder and cried. 

Fjord’s face had tear stains running down his cheeks but his attention was on what was behind Yasha as he whispered, “You’re an angel!” She glanced back to see her wings still exposed and Beau lifted her head and gazed at them. Their expressions of awe were too much for her as she tucked her wings away and the ends of her hair turned white again. 

She carried them back to the clearing where they had stopped for a rest and asked, “What happened?” From on top of her shoulder, Beau sniffled and answered, “I ran in the woods so Molly couldn’t catch me easy but the wolves were there. I didn’t want me and Fjord to get eaten so I climbed a tree so they couldn’t get us and then you showed up.” Yasha gave the girl a smile and said, “You did well. I’m very proud of you, Beau.” Beau returned her smile and asked, “Did you get hurt?” Yasha, not one to raise a fuss simply answered, “Nothing I can’t handle.”

When they returned, Caleb was tucked away in the cart with Nott curled up like a kitten on his lap and Molly standing guard next to Jester making lunch. When Yasha caught sight of them she waved them over. Molly ran up, a look of concern on his face, and asked, “Did something happen dear? Are they alright?”

Without a word, Yasha handed Fjord over to Molly, walked towards the cart, and set Beau down inside. Caleb looked at Beau with relief and questioned, “Are you alright?” Beau leaned against the side of the cart and nodded that she was fine. He smiled at her and asked, “Can you carry me next time?” She regarded him with a look of surprise before responding, “Sure, Bren.” He grinned and moved so that he was leaning against her shoulder. 

Molly eventually set Fjord in the back as well and told them, “We’ll finish packing up and by the time the sun sets we should be in town.” He handed the kids a few apples and said, “This should tide you over til dinner. Nott should be fine for now, just let her nap.” They nodded their heads in understanding and dug into their fruits.

Molly was right; by the time the sun had set, they were already inside a small town and purchasing rooms. Jester and Yasha sat with the children while they waited for food to arrive. Nott had woken up and had immediately crawled over to Fjord, nuzzling and cooing in his lap as he told Caleb about the fight. Beau jumped in occasionally, providing little details that may have been overlooked, and by the end of it, Caleb was begging to see her wings as well. 

Yasha gave him a smile and told him, “Maybe when we’re not in public.” He nodded and insisted, “Promise?” He held out his pinkie and she wrapped her own around his and replied, “Promise.” Satisfied, he sat back down in Jester’s lap as Molly approached with a few plates of food. He passed them to Jester and Yasha as he told them, “I got us two rooms so that we wouldn’t be overcrowded. We’ll decide after dinner how we want to do this.” 

Fjord volunteered to feed Nott as he declared, “I’m her big brother so I need to feed her too!” Molly almost told him that they were not related but was stopped as Jester jumped in, “Of course Fjord! Here, we got some milk you can give her.” Thankfully, the milk was definitely fresh and safe enough to drink. 

Fjord gently poured little mouthfuls between her tiny lips. The infant swallowed and grinned as she pressed her clawed little hands against the cup and tugged in order to eat faster. The half-orc boy held steady and gently scolded, “No, you gots to eat slower.” She did not understand but it seemed Fjord was feeding her at an acceptable pace so she did not fuss.

Eventually, she finished off half the cup before Jester put a rag over her shoulder and patted her back. She let out a small burp, thankfully nothing came up, and curled up in Fjord’s arms. The boy had managed to finish his food while Nott was being burped and now held her happily in his arms. 

Jester smiled happily at the picture and told the kids, “Tomorrow we’ll get you some clothes and I’ll tell you guys cool stories.” They smiled in excitement and rubbed at their eyes tiredly. Molly grinned and said, “Before all that I think our little ones need to sleep.” Yasha stood up and offered, “I’ll get them to bed. Jester did you want to come?” The blue tiefling stood up as well and nudged a half-asleep Caleb awake as she responded, “Sure just let me grab my bag.”

Beau and the others walked ahead, carefully making sure that the rest of the Mighty Nein could see them, and crossed the room to the staircase. On their way over, a man, probably drunk, spotted them and asked, “What’s a bunch of’ kids doing here?” Beau glared at him and placed herself between the others and the drunk. He took another drink from his tankard and said, “Yer parents should be looking after ya.” Beau’s face went red as she told him, “Shut up and go away!” 

He chuckled and took a few wobbly steps towards them, prompting Beau to nudge the others closer to the stairs. The drunk looked them over closely and the grin dropped from his face when he spotted Nott asleep in Fjord’s arms as he growled, “Gimme that little beast.” Fjord stepped away from him and screamed, “Don’t touch her!” The man laughed mirthlessly and spat, “‘Her’? Damn thing’s a goblin! Gotta kill’em while their young or else they grow into little thieves.” Beau’s glare grew angrier as she growled, “Don’t talk about his sister like that! You’re just a stupid drunk!” He gave Beau a patronizing look as he taunted, “Oh? And what’re you gonna do about it little girl?” 

She took a stance, pulled back her fist, and drove it into his groin. He keeled over, nearly puking, as she sent another fist into his face and sent him crashing into another man. The man he crashed into stood up and swung at the first thing behind him, which was another drunk. That one then whirled around and shoved the first drunk, who was just now standing up, into the one that swung at him. From there it became an all out brawl.

Across the room, Molly and Jester watched as Beau defended herself and the bar descended into chaos. Yasha had been a few steps behind the kids when the chaos started and rushed to put herself between the kids and the fighting. Beau was already pulling the others upstairs as Yasha ushered them into one of the rooms, shut the door, and locked it behind her. 

Fjord felt tears in his eyes as he asked, “Why’d he wanna hurt my sister?” Yasha’s eyes softened at the sad look on his face as she told him, “People are quick to judge and can be very cruel to people they don’t understand. You did good protecting Nott like that.” Beau huffed as she took a seat on one of the beds and told Fjord, “He was a drunk shit-head with a big mouth so don’t listen to him Fjord.” 

He smiled and crawled onto the bed with Nott clinging to his chest. Caleb joined them and added, “No one will get your  _ schwester _ with us around.” Yasha smiled as she informed them, “I’m going to check on the others, don’t open the door for strangers.” They agreed as she left and walked down the stairs.

Downstairs, the bar was absolutely filled with drunk, aggressive, and slap-happy people brawling. Molly and Jester were weaving as best they could through the mass of fighting drunks, and some that were not. Aside from a few stray punches meant for someone else, they made it mostly intact to the bottom of the staircase. 

Molly looked around and found himself feeling both annoyed and largely impressed at how quickly the fight started and turned into a free-for-all. Jester scowled as she caught sight of the man who had harassed her friends and told Molly, “One second.” She moved towards him, ignored that he was currently swinging at another drunken brawler, spun him around, dropped him with one punch, and threw him in the middle of the crowd.

Yasha smiled at Jester as she returned, as did Molly, and commented, “Good work.” Jester wiped imaginary dust off her hands and walked up the stairs. She gave them a little grin as she moved towards the room the kids were in and told them, “Nobody fucks with my friends.” With her piece said, she opened the door to the kids’ room and was met with a barrage of shrieks and pillows.

She sputtered a bit, vaguely aware of Molly’s laughter behind her, as Beau’s young voice cried out, “Hold your fire!” She looked at the room; the kids were standing on top of one of the beds, each one holding their arms out like they had thrown the downy cushions. 

The three old enough to have thrown the pillows sat back on the bed and sheepishly murmured, “Sorry, Jester.” Nott was on her own pillow, cuddling it like a toy, and giggling at Jester’s shocked expression. Jester pursed her lips together as she exclaimed, “What was that for?!” Beau looked at her lap as she muttered, “Yasha said to not let strangers in and we thought you were a stranger.”

Molly smirked and said, “I think it’s time for little ones to go to bed, go on.” Beau, in a way reminiscent of her older self, crossed her arms and stated, “We are in bed.” Molly’s smirk dropped for a full second before he told her, “Then I guess that means you’re ready to sleep, Miss Snark.” She smiled and declared, “We want a story.” 

“Easy enough.”

“No, we want a real story.”

“Is there any other?”

“We want a cool one like I tell.”

“Why don’t you tell it then?”

“I've told all the ones I know, we want a new one.”

“Very well.”

“No fake-y stupid ones!”

“I wouldn’t dare!”

She regarded him with suspicion but sat back against the returned pillows and looked at him expectantly. The two five-year-olds tucked themselves in on either side of her, like they had done before, and also looked at him waiting. Nott let go of her pillow, held her tiny arms out to him, and made a grabbing motion. 

He scooped her into his arms, enjoying the happy cooing noise she made as he cradled her. He looked at their expectant faces and began, “Once there was a tavern, it wasn’t very extraordinary at the time but, it was there our heroes met and started on a fantastical journey…” 

He detailed the arrival at the tavern, the circus and the incredible feats of the performers, the shenanigans during the investigation, and the epic battle against the demon toad. The children listened intently, gasping in shock or laughing at something funny that had happened. Towards the end, he watched their eyes slowly close as he told them of the grumpy lady that had sent them on their way and the fate of the circus.

As he uttered the last word, he saw the trio at the head of the bed fast asleep and hugging one another. He gently lowered the goblin baby onto the pillow she had claimed earlier, and draped a blanket over her small form. He glanced over to see Yasha in the other bed, grinning, as he whispered, “Look after them for us dear.” She nodded and laid against the backboard as Molly quietly slipped out and softly closed the door.

When morning came, the first thing Molly heard was a giggling Jester who was trying and failing to suppress her laughter. He opened his eyes ready to ask what was going on when he realized he could not sit up. He glanced down and saw a smiling Beau on his chest. He was understandably confused until he noticed a strange feeling on his face, feet, and hands. 

He lifted her off his chest and sat up. His toes were every shade of the rainbow and his claws had something sparkly coating them. He groaned as he asked, “What’d you do to my face?” Beau smiled even wider as she sang, “Noooothing!” He glared at Jester and told her, “You’re a horrible influence, you know that right?” 

Jester smiled, much like Beau at the moment, and cheerily responded, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He let out another groan and reached towards his bag as he told them, “Joke’s on you I love what she’s done to my nails.” Jester stuck her tongue out at him and called, “C’mon Beau, we should get some food.” 

The girl followed eagerly and left Molly with his new look. He swore that morning to never share a room with a follower of a trickster god ever again. Letting out a sigh, he trudged into the washroom and examined his face in the mirror. 

As expected of Jester, there was a dick painted on his cheek. There was also a smiley face on his forehead and a sword next to the dick with a bubble that said ‘En guarde’. He chuckled a little at that as he noticed the mustache and beard that had been doodled on him. In addition to all this was ‘The Traveler was here’ on the opposite cheek next to a green figure flipping him off.

He smiled as he scrubbed at his face and whispered, “Oh she’s gonna get it for this.” He knew it was definitely Beau who had painted his toes, maybe helped with his nails, but it was definitely Jester who had painted on his face. Normally he would find it hilarious but, he would not stand someone messing with his dashing, good-looks.

He stalked down the stairs and saw that the dining area was in good condition despite last night’s brawl. In the corner of the room, he saw Yasha and the other kids sitting and eating. Nott was being fed some sort of porridge while the others sat with plates of eggs. Beau looked at him, a little warily, and asked, “Are you mad about your nails, Molly?” 

He tapped one sparkly nail on the table, definitely catching Nott’s attention, and told her, “Not at all dear, I happen to love what you did.” Her face lit up as she inquired, “Really? You don’t mind?” Sensing a deeper meaning behind the question, he responded, “Of course! I happen to think you did a wonderful job. But next time let’s discuss  _ consent _ before painting someone.” She shoved another forkful of egg into her mouth and hummed happily.

Once everyone had been fed, they managed to find a tailor who was reasonably priced. Their company did garner a few strange looks but they ignored them as Molly smiled at the woman behind the counter and greeted, “Fine day, isn’t it? My friends and I happen to be in the market for some clothes for our little companions. Do you have anything that might work?” The tailor was a little taken aback but once she saw the excited looks on the kids’ faces, her features softened and she told him, “I think I’ve got a few things that will work.”

She had an incredible selection and for a few gold pieces, they managed to secure three sets of tunics, pants, and small boots for the three older children. Beau decided that she wanted her tunic to be a jade green and her pants were a darker green. Jester also took a bit of blue ribbon and, though the undercut was no longer there, tied her long hair into a bun. Beau gave her a smile and thanked her.

Fjord on the other hand, was nervous as he told Molly that he was fine with something plain. Despite his claim, Molly could see the child’s eyes dart over to the other brightly colored clothing. He smiled gently and steered the child over to a deep blue tunic, reflective of the ocean, with little wave patterns around the hem. Fjord looked up at Molly in surprise as the tiefling told him, “I think this would look wonderful on you, Dearie.” 

Caleb was easier, the moment he saw the ember-like red of a child’s tunic, he turned to the adults and asked if that one would be alright. Pleased that the selection was enough, Molly also grabbed a canary yellow shirt to dress Nott in. Boots were found, tried on, and purchased. Nott was given a thick pair of socks and, for a few extra silver, every child was given a black cloak.

Once dressed Molly found himself happy that the children looked comfortable  _ and _ fashionable. Beau was happily running ahead in her new clothes that allowed her to move freely as she hoisted Caleb, his red tunic draping down to his knees above his black pants, and started weaving through the crowd of people. Fjord held Nott’s hand as he had her walk on his feet. She was unable to actually walk but delighted that Fjord was making it seem so. His navy blue pants hung a little too loose on him but Molly knew he would not have to worry much about that.

While wandering about, Jester took the lead and guided the children over to a store. Molly and Yasha smiled as Jester announced, “Pick a toy to play with and I’ll get it for you!” They stood still for a moment before Beau pulled the boys over to the shelves and said, “If you can’t reach I’ll grab it for you.” 

Caleb smiled as he pointed to a large book just out of his reach and asked, “Can you reach it, Beau?” She smirked as she grabbed it, using both hands due to its enormity, and passed it down to him. Fjord took a few small steps back and murmured, “I don’t need anything, thank you.” Beau frowned as she said, “Are you sure? It’s probably gonna be a long trip.” Fjord nodded, not taking his eyes off his feet, and replied, “I’m sure, I’m not allowed to either.”

Every muscle in Molly, Yasha, and Jester’s body tightened simultaneously as Jester snapped, “Fjord! Every kid deserves something to play with no matter what any  _ stupid _ adult says. You’re definitely allowed to get something.” He opened his mouth, most likely to object, when Yasha asked, “Who said you’re not allowed to have a toy, Fjord?” 

He looked back at the floor before replying, “The caretakers, they say I can’t have one ‘cause I’ll break it.” Molly bit his lip to keep from using profane language in front of them, though it was obvious Beau already knew a few choice profanities, and told the boy, “You’re with us and while you’re with us you can have a toy, nice clothes, and as much food as you can eat, understand?” Fjord nodded, looking a bit speechless, and slowly wandered over to the shelves.

Beau helped him while Jester spied a silver rattle that shone brightly and grabbed it for Nott. The baby squealed in delight, wriggling happily as Jester shook it in front of her, and stuck it in her toothless mouth the moment she got her little claws on it. Fjord eventually spied a pair of wooden swords and offered one to Beau. She smiled and called out, “Jester, we found something we both want!” The toys were swiftly paid for and soon they made their way back to the inn for one more night's rest before heading out the next morning.

The next morning was relatively peaceful, they woke and fed the children quickly before bundling them into the cart where they continued sleeping. Beau was the first up, stretching and pulling her cloak around her. She rubbed at her eyes before climbing towards the front of the cart and seating herself next to Yasha. Fjord, only half-awake, sat next to Nott and Caleb as he woke himself. 

Nott also woke soon after, shrieking in a way that meant she wanted something. Fjord quickly responded by finding her rattle and shaking it in front of her. She quieted quickly as the shiny toy jingled, the soft sound of bells soothing her, and cooed. Fjord continued to shake it and grinned as Nott’s squeal of joy filtered through the sounds of the horses.

Caleb was the last as he sat up and immediately ran his small fingers over the cover of his new book. It was a large collection of folktales across the Dwyndalian Empire, fully illustrated and with notes in the back about where the stories came from and when they originated. Caleb was simply content with having a book to practice reading. 

About midday, they stopped only a few miles from Zadash. As they pulled over, Molly dismounted his horse and called out, “Lunch time! All little ones out of the cart!” They managed to climb out with help from the adults and proceeded to pull out their toys to play with while lunch was being prepared.

Fjord and Beau chased each other with their swords, swiping at random bushes and trees while shouting, “Take that demon!” Fjord mostly followed Beau and stabbed at the things she did with a giggled, “I got it too!”A few minutes later, Beau ran up to a tree and paused. Fjord bumped into her but she simply smiled and asked, “You know what this is?” 

He peered around her to examine the tree; its trunk was thick and it was much taller than the other trees nearby. Fjord shrugged as she told him, “It’s a demon toad.” He smiled as he cried out, ”Let’s get it!” They cheered as they both rushed it, Beau leaping into the branches and playfully stabbing at the bark and Fjord playfully pretending to shoot magic from his hands.

Nott crawled over, drawn by the excited noises the other two were making, and tugged at Fjord. He smiled and lifted her into one arm, still pretending to fire at the ‘demon toad’ with the other, and asked, “Are you gonna help us beat the demon toad, Nottie?” She squealed as he aimed back and called out, “Watch out, Beau! I’m gonna blast it away!” Beau grinned as she leapt out of the way of the ‘magic blast’ as he yelled, mimicking what he had heard in Molly’s story, “Eldritch Blast!”

Everyone froze as Fjord was knocked onto his back by the force of two glowing green arcane bursts shot out of his hand and slammed into the tree. Fjord was wise enough to pull Nott close so that when he fell, she was not hurt. Even so, he looked at his hand in utter horror as Beau screamed, “MOLLY! JESTER! YASHA!” The adults ran over as Fjord sat there in shock and fear before handing Nott to Beau and running a distance away.

Jester saw him and shouted, “Stay there, Fjord! We’re coming!” He pulled his hands to his chest and shifted closer to the forest’s edge. Yasha narrowed her eyes and told him, “Stay put, Fjord!” He winced but stayed where he was as they ran to catch up. 

Jester reached him first, and seeing his body language, demanded, “Are you okay, Fjord? What happened? Are you hurt?” Like every time he was faced with positive adult attention, he kept his gaze lowered and held his fists close to his chest as though hiding them. Jester took his hands in hers and gently reassured, “It’s gonna be okay, Fjord. We’re not mad we’re worried you might’ve gotten hurt.”

The tears came to his eyes as he trembled and asked, “What if I hurt Nottie? Or Beau? The caretakers were right, I’m bad!” Jester pulled him against her body, holding his head to her chest, and told him, “You’re not bad! You’re a handsome, smart, and caring little boy who really needs a hug right now.” He clung to her as she held him, rocking the child’s sobbing body as she did, and told him, “You’re okay. Nott’s okay. Beau is probably going to be so jealous that you have powers but she’s okay.” 

Fjord sniffled a little as he murmured, “She’s not mad? Or scared?” Jester shook her head negatively and told him, “She’ll probably want you to do it again but don’t. We’re going to see a friend of ours who knows a lot about this stuff.” His eyes widened in amazement, even as he wiped away the tears, and found himself calming as Jester described Pumat Sol and his store The Invulnerable Vagrant. 

By the time she had calmed him to the point he was no longer crying, Jester lifted and carried the boy back to the others. Aware that he was back with the rest of the group, Fjord looked at Beau nervously and mumbled, “I’m sorry I almost blasted you.” Beau wrapped him in a hug and told him, “It’s cool. Now you got superpowers!” Nott, once she spotted Fjord, crawled into his lap and rubbed under his chin with her head. He hugged her as she squealed and wrapped her small arms around his neck.

Once things were taken care of, they got back onto the road and by sundown had entered the city. They managed to secure rooms at The Leaky Tap, not without a few odd looks at the ragtag group of children and adults. The kids excitedly looked at Claudia and asked, “Is this your inn?” She gave the children a gentle smile as she informed them, “Yes it is. I’m guessing you’re here with The Mighty Nein aren’t you? It’s… It’s been a while.” 

Caleb’s look of absolute bafflement made Jester and Molly snicker as he repeated, “The Mighty...Nein?” Molly put a hand on his shoulder and explained, “One of our members thought it would be both funny and ironic.” He nodded his head in understanding, though if he truly understood was unclear. 

Beau walked up to the bar counter, followed by Fjord and Nott, and let out a soft gasp as she whispered, “He’s got scales!” Wessek turned around and spotted the curious trio and told them, “I don’t serve underage I’m afraid. Where’s yer parents?” Fjord took Beau’s hand as she pointed towards the trio of adults and let him know, “They’re watching us. Why’ve you got scales?” 

He chuckled as he proudly held out an arm in offering and asked, “You never seen a dragonborn before?” They all reached out to touch his scales, including Nott from her place in Fjord’s arm. The baby clung to his arm and giggled as she placed her cheek against it. He chuckled merrily as he called to the remaining members of The Mighty Nein, “Yer little one seems easily attached.” 

Jester ran over and carefully pulled Nott off his arm. She fussed, whined, and reached out for the dragonborn while Jester scolded, “You can’t just cling to everyone who picks you up!” She squirmed and her whines started to border on cries as Jester kept her from reattaching herself to the dragonborn. 

Nott kicked with her sock covered feet unhappily as she made a grabbing motion towards Wessek. He patted the infant’s head and told Jester, “Just needs a drink.” He grabbed a small bottle and handed it to her, saying, “It’s just some fruit juice but it’ll do in a pinch.” He also poured small glasses for the others and told her it was included with the payment for their rooms. 

Nott settled when Beau showed her that she was drinking some juice and mimicked her. She nursed the bottle appeased as Jester walked her up to the bedroom. Molly decided to share the room with the kids this time, offering to tell them about a group of unlucky bandits the group had encountered. They all laughed hysterically as he described their cleric convincing the bandits to strip; he of course, changed the incineration to vanishing.

As the kids nodded off, he planted a kiss on each of their foreheads and tucked them in. He kicked off his boots and fell back against his pillow as he listened to the sound of kids murmuring in their sleep. Sleep claimed him quickly and suddenly as he listened for anything out of the ordinary.

It was fortunate he was listening or he would have never heard the soft cries of a baby as another child attempted to soothe her. He sat up and saw Caleb trying to console Nott as he whispered, “It’s okay,  _ Ich bin da _ . I’m here.” Molly crept over to the child and softly questioned, “What’s wrong, Bren?” He jumped a little, his human eyes not much help in the dark, and replied, “ _ Herr _ Molly,  _ sie est heiß! _ Nott is hot!” 

Molly took the baby from him and immediately could feel the goblin baby was much warmer than healthy. He muttered a curse under his breath and ordered, “Stay here, I need Jester to check on her!” The boy nodded as Molly ran out of the room, baby in arms, and pounded on Jester and Yasha’s door.

A disheveled Jester answered the door and was about to complain when she saw the look of fear on Molly’s face and heard the distressed cries from Nott. She took the baby in hand and focused for a moment as she cast Lesser Restoration. A gentle glow emanated from the blue tiefling’s hands and Nott’s face slowly shifted from pained to relaxed to asleep. 

Molly sighed in relief as Nott was passed back to him and the baby grabbed his silk shirt. Jester also sighed in relief as she whispered, “Molly, what the  _ fuck _ !” He groaned softly and told her, “I don’t know, Caleb was awake and trying to calm her down. She was just crying!” She sighed and told him, “Let’s go back to bed, I’ll check on her again in the morning.” When he did get back to his room, Molly saw Beau hugging Caleb and telling him, “See, Molly brought her back so it’s okay.”

Thankfully, whatever had caused Nott’s fever was gone by the sunrise. Caleb decided he wanted to carry Nott that morning. Fjord let him, though he seemed a little hesitant, and clutched onto Beau. She smiled and walked them down with Yasha as they waited for the other adults to appear with breakfast.

Once fed, they walked the kids through the streets of Zadash to The Invulnerable Vagrant. The moment they stepped inside, one of the Pumats looked up and greeted, “Well howdy there folks. It’s been a while.” The kids gaped at the imposing figure of Pumat Sol as another walked in and commented, “Well there, seems you folks have picked up some, uh, new additions.” 

Nott, with all her tiny lungs could muster, shrieked in delight and bounced in Caleb’s arms. Pumat looked over the counter curiously and reached out to pat the goblin girl’s head as he remarked, “Well, aren’t you just the cutest little thing.” Jester smiled as she waved and said, “Pumat! These are our friends Beau, Fjord, Bren, and Nott. We saved them from an evil wizard.” 

He gave her a knowing look as he told her, “I think I understand the situation.” Molly gave him a weak smile and said, “We could really use your help, our usual expert is indisposed at the moment.” He flicked his eyes to Caleb’s wonder-filled face, as Pumat told him, “I gotcha, if all you little folks could group together real quick, that’d be great.”

A little hesitantly, they clumped together as Pumat began going through the motions Caleb would to identify charms, magic, or other such things. He finished the spell and turned towards the rest of the group and said, “The effects of what happened should fade in a few days. Other than that, just keep’em safe.” Jester’s smile turned brighter as she exclaimed, “Thank you so much Pumat!” He waved her off and told the kids, “You be good, alright?” They nodded as he gently ruffled each of their heads.

Nott cooed and squealed as Pumat also gave her a tickle under her chin and said, “Yer just a bundle of happiness aren’tcha?” Fjord stepped forward, looking a little less afraid, and informed him, “She’s my baby sister! Or we think she’s my sister!” He smiled and told the boy, “That's wonderful! Do you know why yer friends got taken too?” Fjord shrugged as he told him, “No but Beau’s like a big sister and Bren’s like a twin so maybe we’re supposed to be friends.”

Jester cooed as Beau offered, “Yeah, and my parents suck so I’m gonna stick with them until I’m big.” Caleb gave a soft smile as he said, “When we are safe, you can come live with me and my family.” The other two grinned and Beau declared, “Until then, you guys are our moms and dad!” She pointed at the trio of adults and the other kids nodded in agreement, except for Nott who had crawled over to Pumat and was clutching his leg.

Yasha gently removed her and tucked the baby on her shoulder. Molly smirked as he said, “That’s the idea. Don’t worry we’ll make sure no one messes with you lot again.” Beau held out her pinkie and asked, “Pinkie Promise?” He wrapped his own around hers and replied, “Pinkie Promise.” She smiled as Yasha suddenly let out a soft ‘oh’ noise and called out, “Bren?” 

He turned to her and her hair went entirely black as her wings unfurled. He gasped as she told him, “I Pinkie Promised.” Caleb grinned as the other kids cheered and she put away her wings. Caleb took her hand, and asked, “Can we get lunch?” Molly chuckled and told him, “Let’s get you some true Zadash cuisine!”

The next few days went by in a blur, the four of them playing together, nearly getting kicked out from all the noise, and stories before bedtime. As Jester tucked in the kids for one last night, Beau and the other children gave her a pained look as the oldest mumbled, “Jester, I don’t feel good.” 

Fjord whimpered and grabbed her arm in an effort to comfort himself as he whined, “Me either.” Caleb’s body shuddered as he asked, “ _ Was _ is happening?” She brushed their hair from their faces and cast Lesser Restoration as she answered, “I don’t know but it’s going to be alright.” Nott cried out seeking comfort and whimpering in pain. Fjord scooped her into his arms and hugged her as they all fell into a restless sleep, Jester looking on upset that she was unable to do much.

When the sun arose and lit the interior of the hotel room, the residents slowly came to consciousness. The first thing that happened was screaming, lots of screaming. Molly and Yasha came running into the room as they took in the hilarious sight of their party member scrambling to get away from each other in the nude. 

Nott had grabbed a pillow and was currently hiding herself behind it screeching, “What the fuck! What the fuck! What the fuck!” Beau had drawn the blanket over her body and fallen to the floor, her hair loose around her head. Fjord had the other pillow and was using it to cover the only thing he could as he spluttered, “What-?! Why-?! Would someone tell me what the fuck is going on?!” Caleb had managed to snatch Jester’s blanket and wrapped it around his shoulders looking as though he was trapped in a nightmare. 

Jester groaned and commented, “At least it was in our room and not in the street.” Molly chuckled as he sighed, “I suppose we should be grateful for that.” Fjord looked overwhelmed and entirely uncomfortable as he asked, “Would someone please explain what happened and give us back our clothes?” Jester waggled her eyebrows at Fjord and said, “Why? I think you look great, Fjord~?” She added a flirtatious tone to his name that made him flush as he sighed, “Just give us our clothes back, please.”

A few minutes and a few drinks later, The Mighty Nein were dressed and back in full force as the three explained what had happened and revealed a few interesting details they had picked up on. They tried not to mention the things that may be a little too difficult to process,such as Fjord’s accent or Caleb’s name. Aside from those things, there was still plenty that drove the ones who had been changed to drink heavily. Before noon, four of seven members were completely hammered and left their teammates to help them recover one last time.


End file.
